Time for a change.... WEEK Four: Recreate my relationship cocoon
When I was a child, we had 2 cars. My mom had a VW Rabbit and my dad had an Opal, then a Scirocco.
After learning that a sirocco translates to a hot, wild wind in Italian, I imagined that was the perfect description of what falling and being in love would be like. As I have gained experience, years and a trail of relationships, I began a #relationship that is the opposite of what I always thought I would find.
We started as friends and I never imagined that it would progress into more, then one day it did. I started a relationship with an introvert, more of an introvert than I ever had met before. We shared #silence, but it was never uncomfortable. We never said anything to hurt each other or to manipulate each other. There was complete and utter honesty in everything we said to each other. What this love lacked in the traditional idea of #romance, was balanced by #genuine, caring and constant companionship. This man had my back, he cared about what was important to me and what I wanted and I felt the same about him.
In recent months, there have been so many stresses; good and bad: that it seemed that we were just passing each other on our way to other things, barely making eye contact. We had stopped doing things that we loved doing together.... no more cooking together, binge watching shows, talking or #puzzles . Then one day, with the puppy crying and barking, the kitchen dirty, 4 hours of sleep the whole night and 20 things I needed to get done after and before work, I had an anxiety attack. The walls were closing in, I couldn't catch my breath and it felt as though EVERYTHING was getting away from me, everything was too hard.
A couple glasses of wine, some chocolate truffles, and a whiff of lavender and thieves defuser oils gave me enough of a break to calm down and reflect back to how I ended up here. I realized that we had let everything else become more important than the reason we were in this house, this neighborhood, and got the puppy in the first place. We realized that we stopped looking to each other to balance out the others moods.
It took a couple days to get back in sync, but we talked and talked and talked. All things are manageable, the problems are so small in the scheme of things, BECAUSE we have each other, we have our #bubble.... things can pierce it, but not penetrate it because it's only big enough for us and maybe Mimosa. There are going to be challenges ahead;. big ones; but we like each other and love each other, and we have a pile of puzzles waiting to be done.